What's Really in the Way of Healing Your Trauma
Mar 21, 2021

Picture this: For years, you’re working on yourself, doing all sorts of therapy, healing ceremonies, meditations, and other obscure practices, only to find yourself triggered by an unforeseen event and back in a rut.

You thought you figured out all your relationship issues and believed you were ready for The One, only to repeat the same patterns and end up frustrated and more self-critical than ever.

Then, on top of everything, your mind gives you unsolicited advice: I should know better by now.

When you believe that voice in your head, it’s easy to feel defeated and lose sight of the progress you’ve made in your healing journey. It’s frustrating, but you’re not alone.

Over the last seven years as an embodiment coach, I’ve worked with hundreds of clients. There are three main reasons that people stay stuck in their traumas — and how to become unstuck.

1. Let go of false expectations. There is no end goal.

Most people go through life working toward whatever they feel they need to have finally “made it” and “have it all together.” I’m sorry to tell you this, but you will never end up in a place where “it” is done. Every time you reach the end, you will uncover another layer of the onion. And peeling onions, as we know, will make us cry.

The first step of healing trauma is really about false expectations. We’re setting ourselves up for failure if we expect to never be triggered or fuck up ever again. The antidote for this is simply acceptance; accept that you will always be sensitive, or needy, or a little bit controlling, or immature, or whatever it is.

Welcome to the human experience! Practice acceptance and then watch what happens.

2. Stop playing the shame game.

If there is one thing that keeps trauma in your life, it’s shame. Shame is the voice that says “there is something wrong with me” or “I’m not good enough.”

Trauma is frozen energy stuck in your body. We can experience this energy as negative, paranoid, obsessive thinking. As fears and self-sabotaging narratives. As feelings of disempowerment, collapse, and de-motivation. Or as feelings of rigidity, perfectionism, and addiction.

These feelings are a manifestation of the disconnect from our core, and an identification with the frozen energy of trauma we have inside, and that may feel excruciatingly painful to us. It may, indeed, make us misinterpret our rather “innocent” symptoms and believe there is something wrong with us.

So what to do?

The key lies in the concept of “I.” When there is something fundamentally wrong with “me,” then I’m doomed for life. Because the flaw is fundamental to myself, nothing I could ever do would take me beyond the feeling of not being good enough and not belonging. That’s really a scary place to live from.

If, however, we change our perspective just a little bit, shift our focus slightly sideways, so to speak, and start perceiving our negative inner monologue as the symptoms of a wound that happened to an innocent child, a whole new dimension of feeling opens up. We can call it compassion.

Compassion allows for space between the observer and the experience. It allows us to question the ideas that our inner monologue sets forth as true: What if it’s not true that I am broken and unworthy? What if I’m okay exactly the way I am, warts and all?

It allows for regulating our fear response by breathing deeper. It allows for the courage to meet the frozen energy inside that so often feels like it is too big for us. Terrifying as it may be, when we don’t identify with that frozen energy, and instead find a resource in our acceptance and compassion for ourselves, we create space for that energy to unravel.

Which brings me to the third point:

3. Create internal safety.

Recently a client of mine asked me, “How do I know it’s safe to trust?”

The truth is you don’t know until you do. Overcoming the fear response doesn’t happen by waiting for the fear to subside before you can trust. It happens by becoming intimately familiar with the fear in your system, so you can start creating a healthy distance to it and make space for curiosity instead.

Start creating internal safety by honoring your feelings of unsafety.

The idea is that if you have always felt X and reacted with Y and the result was Z, maybe you can react differently to feeling X and see if there will be a different result.

This process of experiencing safety cannot be forced, however. That just puts pressure on yourself, and creates false expectations that lands you back in the cycle of shame.

Instead, start creating internal safety by honoring your feelings of unsafety.

It’s taken me years to acknowledge the fact that I am sensitive and that being in large groups of people overwhelms my nervous system. Only now am I starting to truly honor my need for my space when I’m in those environments, which involves saying “no” to certain interactions.

My internal narrative went from:

What’s wrong with me? Why am I feeling so insecure and small when I’m around those people? I need to force myself to be good enough by overgiving and overcaring.


I honor my sensitivity. I know it’s okay to be vulnerable and not have it all together. What do I need right now? Do I need to be in nature, or ask for support?

I feel safe because I am in touch with myself.

This has been a slow process. There is no silver bullet for building trust. There is only the willingness to explore your assumptions, to experiment, and your ability to stay in connection with yourself.

Staying in connection with yourself becomes more potent when you can express it and share it with others. That’s the true test: Can you honor your truth in the face of the other?

When we do that, we are able to change the story of “I’m not good enough” into “I feel safe because I own all of me.” This reinforces that safety comes from within ourselves.

TTrauma is a complex experience. It’s wonderful to do all that we’re doing to become more free, more embodied, more of who we are meant to be.

But on our journey toward wholeness, it’s easy to fall prey to these areas of false expectations, of shame and judgment, and of not honoring where we are.

Be gentle with yourself. You are already doing great — otherwise, you wouldn’t be reading this. Celebrate each step you are making toward your wholeness.

Have you ever tried to domesticate a wild animal? It’s really like that. It took me a year to stroke the wild cat outside my house and another year to pick her up. Every time I got impatient, I stalled the process.

Healing our wounds requires the same amount of patience, dedication, compassion, and understanding toward the inner animal that is our body and nervous system.

So be gentle and celebrate each step.

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Spiritual Healing
$49 USD
Meet Your Spiritual Consultant: Healing, Insights & Growth [Discovery Call]

> Connect with your Higher Self.
> Remember who you are.

~ Mateusz Bajerski, Spiritual Consultant


This is a Discovery Call of 45 minutes. We will create a safe space in order to connect with your heart and listen to what your heart has to share—heart coherence—when it comes to what you're looking for in your healing, growth and expansion, bringing you in alignment with your soul journey while your life is shaped and re-shaped in the face of uncertainty. During this same call, intuitive insight will be provided and a grounding technique in relation to what you're going through will be taught: this will enable us to know each other better.

A healing, insights and growth plan proposition will be shared, drawing from hypnotherapy practices to build a stronger bridge to your Higher Self, your own source of limitless power and knowledge as you move with the ebb and flow of life.

Does it suit me?

Are you looking to be better attuned to your True Spiritual Self and learn about the mosaic of your Soul as you face the uncertainty of life? Are you looking to grow, expand and access your limitless inner power and knowledge?

Are you looking to collaborate with a Spiritual Consultant along this journey of accelerated ascension?


The benefits of spiritual healing, growth and expansion incorporating hypnotherapy allow total transformation, connecting you to your own source of wisdom and limitless knowledge—your Higher Self.

✓ One-on-one sessions virtual or in-person
✓ Blocks of 1h to 1h30
✓ Bridging the gap between the spiritual and the physical planes


You can expect:
✓ The spiritual consultant to personally be present with you throughout, including the follow-up
✓ Learning the heart coherence technique
✓ Being in an alpha state of consciousness—relaxed state
✓ Learning a grounding technique
✓ A healing plan proposition drawing from hypnotherapy practices to be shared

Disclaimer: Please note that the effective attunement to an expanded state of consciousness is a practice that is sustained in order for our brain to create new neural pathways. It is possible to nurture long-lasting and permanent positive outcomes with targeted hypnotherapy over a sustained period of time.


Breathe in deeply and exhale slowly five times. Set your intentions. Please ensure you are sober.

About the spiritual consultant

Mateusz Bajerski, BA Philosophy, MA Cognitive Science, Dip. Hyp. HNWHP (PHPA), is a London-based spiritual consultant, incorporating hypnotherapy into his healing practice. Born in Częstochowa, Poland, he went on a soul-searching journey across Europe before opening his practice in London, England. His travels were inspired by a deep self-questioning stage of his life marked by the passing away of his father and the depression that followed. Mateusz found self-forgiveness through an Ayahuasca ceremony.

A motorcycle accident in 2017 helped him re-align with his soul’s mission and led him to start his successful spiritual practice. He has guided 200+ individuals in connecting with their Higher Self to clear subconscious emotional blockages, opening a safe space for insights and growth, and equipping them with tools to self-regulate in order to consciously create a reality of their own.

With a BA in Philosophy and an MA in Cognitive Science, Mateusz Bajerski, Dip. Hyp. HWHP, is part of the Professional Hypnotherapy Practitioners Association (PHPA). He trained at UK’s Hypnotic World International Academy of Hypnotherapy–GHSC Assessed and Accredited. He was also a student of Dr Aleksander Daniłow, a psychotherapist in clinical hypnosis working with politicians, business people and actors. He trained at the practice of the renowned Dr Andrzej Kaczorowski, the author of “Conscious and Unconscious Self-Hypnosis: The Effective Therapy To Release Your Limitations,” “The Power of Hypnosis,” “Reincarnation And Hypnosis In Therapy,” “Hypnosis and Dreams,” “Reincarnation In Hypnotherapy” and “Reincarnation in Hypnosis.”

Mateusz Bajerski
Spiritual Healing
$69 USD
healing session
Energy healing session


Distance energy healings session provides you with better vibes after healing. I will clean you with energy from God/Universe. All tensions and obsticals will go away. Feeling better is always my moto. After this session you will feel better. Much better.

Target audience

Everyone who wants to grow their energy and be in better vibes.


Feeling better and having better vibes in your body. You will feel like that you just came out of the water. Clean and refreshed.


People feel different in session. Mostly they see light colours and feel light.


Just be relaxed and calm down.

Other comments

Spiritual Healing
$60 USD
coaching session
Spiritual Life Coaching

There is no coincidence that you have travelled so far in your journey to get to this point in which your soul wishes to get supported to facilitate your spiritual development.

Walking a spiritual path without any dogmatic conditions, yet an unknown ocean of higher and more purified energies, where you want to move forward from the ordinary to the extraordinary, might be overwhelming and confusing.

The good news is that You do not have to walk that path alone! My job as a Spiritual Life Coach is to help you walk the path with ease. I am here to support your personal evolution without any judgment or comparisons, as I understand that you are a unique soul.

If you are looking to reach higher levels of consciousness and understanding of your inner world with regards to your purpose and meaning in life, most definitely you have found the right hands and guide to serve you.

Spirituality is nothing else than gaining the awareness of your inner and outer energies, your relationship with yourself, others, and your external world.

As a coach, I assist you with:

  • Finding, your inner truth, re-inventing yourself and building a higher version of yourself.
  • Helping you to create or re-invent your spiritual experience in your own way, and in your own terms.
  • Supporting you while on your own transformational inner journey.

I help you obtaining results on:

  1. Overcoming mental self-judgements.
  2. Gaining self-respect.
  3. Eliminating negative self-talk.
  4. Healing what needs to be healed.
  5. Manifesting what you want to achieve.
  6. Experiencing higher estates of happiness, joy, and inner peace.
  7. Developing and practicing your own daily healthy rituals/habits.
Johann Strerath
Spiritual Healing
$115 USD
healing session
Energy Medicine Healing Session

If you've struggled with health symptoms and nothing seems to be working, it's time to find healing.

The body innately knows how to heal. Using medical intuition, I ask this part of you how to remove blocks keeping your health stuck. Stresses of all kinds disrupt our body's ability to heal. As we remove these stresses/blocks, the body can quickly and easily begin to heal and find the way to wellness.

By listening to the body and helping it get unstuck, we treat symptoms at the root cause - when we do this, the body quickly begins to heal. In as little as one to three sessions, major improvements can be seen.

Feel calmer, more peaceful, lighter as blocks are removed. Feel less pain, better digestion, less sickness, more movement.

In this energy healing session, blocks including the following are taken into account:
Karmic: Generational patterns, family patterns, past life/karmic imprints, and more.
Mental: belief systems, destructive thought loops, subconscious programming, trauma.
Emotional: stuck energy, coping mechanisms, inability to allow emotion to process/move, and more.
Physical: organs, glands, hormones, neurotransmitters, cells, epigenetic locks, and more.
Spiritual: cords connecting you to past traumas, difficult relationships, abuse, trauma, environmental triggers, and more.

With precision, I identify blocks and heal them, resulting in focused, effective, powerful, but gentle heart-centered healing.

Reclaim your health. Healing is possible.

30 minute energy medicine session.

Sarah Lascano

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