I want to share with you a book that has absolutely changed my life. It’s called The Life Changing Magic of Tidying: A Simple, Effective Way To Banish Clutter Forever by Marie Kondo, the creator of the KonMari Method.
As the title says, this is a very simple (though not easy) way to get to the root of your clutter problem and help you to resolve it once and for all: If you don’t love it, don’t keep it! Piles of stuff in our homes are one of the greatest stress triggers. Clutter literally increases your cortisol level! When we have a lot of clutter in our homes, it has the affect of distracting us and can even cause chronic restlessness. When you reduce the noise of the things around you, you can focus on creating your life. For most of us, clutter accumulates over time. We don’t notice how much stuff we are accumulating until we hit a breaking point. Sometimes it’s a major life event — such as a move, death, marriage or divorce, or even changing jobs – that forces us to declutter so that we can move on free from the weight of objects that have outlived their usefulness to us.
What Does Your Clutter Symbolize?
- Living and Dining Rooms: These are your main entertaining rooms. Clutter here may mean you are hiding your true self from the world
- Kitchen: The kitchen is often where we dump everything from our daily lives — mail, electronics on chargers, from purses and school bags to dog bowls, vitamins and many other items from our daily lives. All of this clutter in the kitchen can make it difficult to truly nourish yourself and your family
- Hallways: These are the connectors between rooms and represent your ability to flow. Cluttered hallways may mean your life’s path is not clearly defined or thought out
- Bedroom: Clutter in your boudoir may make you feel “wired and tired” and may inhibit intimacy with your partner
- Bathroom: The bathroom is where we pamper ourselves and prepare to face the world. Think about all the products under your sink that you never use. Clutter in this room may mean you lack self worth
- Closets: Closets represent that which is hidden from view. If we stuff our closets we block our ability to use our insight and intuition to “see into” ourselves and situations
- Attic: Attics are typically where we squirrel stuff away that we no longer use or are “saving” for someone or a future event. These things are potentially the most complicated. Attics symbolize our connection to the past and families or ancestors, and also to our higher selves. When you fill your attic with unwanted items, you literally have “stuff hanging over your head” that can make it difficult to resolve issues from your past and grow
- Basement: Like attics, we often look to basements for storage of unwanted or unused items. As in dreams, basements represent the subconscious mind. A cluttered basement can blunt your intuition
- Garage: Cars represent our independence and ability to get around. If there is so much clutter in your garage that you can’t get your car in and out easily, you may feel difficulty moving forward in life
Lighten Up With The KonMari Method
- Tidy all at once. Tidying a bit at a time never works. Things will get messy again quickly. (All at once means allotting about 6 months to the project.)
- Visualize your destination. Before you throw things away, visualize your ideal lifestyle. Goals such as, “I want to live clutter free” or “I want to be able to put things away,” are too broad. You must think in concrete terms, such as: “I want to live like a Goddess, surrounded by peace and beauty.”
- Identify why you want to live the way you envision. For every answer ask yourself “why?” again. For example, if you want to live clutter free so you get a better night’s sleep, ask yourself, “Why do I want to sleep better?” Do this 3-5 times. When you find the answer to why you want to be tidy, you are ready to move on.
- Determine if each item “sparks joy.” Rather than focusing solely on throwing things away, which Ms. Kondo acknowledges only brings unhappiness, be sure to cherish what you love. Do this by taking each item in your hand and asking yourself “does this spark joy?” If yes, then it stays. If it does not spark joy, then throw it out. Note: You must touch every item so that your body can react. This is NOT an intellectual process. It’s a “felt” physical sense that you can develop over time, or the kind of intuition I discuss in depth in Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom. You let your BODY and emotions tell you.
- Tidy by category, not location. In most households, items that fall into the same category are stored in multiple places. If you are tackling your clothes, then you must get all the clothes out of every closet and drawer in every room first. Start with tops first, then bottoms, and work from there. She also instructs you in the fine art of folding, which frees up an enormous amount of closet space. My drawers are now works of art—with my folded blouses and tops arranged like envelopes so that I can see everything easily.
- Tidy in the right order. Ms. Kondo says that the following order is the way to tidy: Clothes, Books, Papers, and then Komono (miscellaneous.) She goes into great detail on how to separate and each category into sub-categories.
- Discard before you place things back. You must discard first. Don’t put anything away until everything you are going to discard is removed.