It’s true what they say, sometimes you have to just be in the moment. And not just the good ones that fill your heart with joy and gratitude - but the bad ones also.
The ones that fill your heart with an unexplainable sadness and melancholy.
As grateful as I am for this past year, if I’m being really honest, 2022 was a mixed bag for me. There were plenty of highs.
But there were also plenty of lows. And I think they deserve just as much acknowledgement and respect as the highs.
And as I sat and reflected on the past year so I could plan this next one I felt the lows start to loom larger and take a form of their own..as if to challenge me and mock my plans for the upcoming year.
They had snuck in like a trojan horse and suddenly taken control of my mind, filling me with doubt and questioning the steps I had taken over the year that just passed and those I was planning to take in the year to come.
Stealthy little suckers those self-defeating thoughts.
But the truth is, we all have them. It’s part of being human. It’s also part of growing and evolving.
A younger version of me would have either turned away from these thoughts and pretended they weren’t there - or spiraled into a black hole of self-criticism, blame, shame and negativity. That version is still a part of me - she just no longer runs the show.
Which is how I know I’ve made progress in this ever continuing journey of self exploration, growth and awareness.
Because the version that is currently staring back in the mirror at me didn’t shame, or judge or hide - she got curious.
I found myself asking what would happen if I just sat with those feelings and let myself feel them instead of hiding from them or judging them. And what if I didn’t worry about raising my vibration or jumping back into positivity as quickly as possible? What if I let these “low vibe” thoughts and feelings tell me why they were here instead?
And so I sat. And I listened. And let the thoughts unfold.
And the more I welcomed them and allowed them to be, the less they started to impact me. You see sometimes it’s less about actually changing the thoughts and emotions and more about changing the impact they have on us. And we can’t change what we can’t see. Which is why bearing witness to our thoughts and emotions - especially the painful and unwanted ones - can actually be such a powerful catalyst for changing and releasing them.
And the gateway for making progress on this beautiful journey we know as life.
Progress and growth isn’t measured or defined by avoiding unwanted thoughts, feelings and emotions. That’s just a form of denial. True progress and growth is reflected in our responses to any unwanted thoughts, emotions and feelings that may come unexpectedly strolling into our minds and bodies.
So the next time you find yourself thinking thoughts you’d rather not have, feeling emotions you’d rather ignore, I invite you to get curious. Ask yourself what are they trying to say to you..what are they hoping to make you aware of?
The answers may surprise you, and possibly even set you free. 💕
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