Hocus pocus new age self-help books always boil down to only two words; Affirmations and Conditioning.
Coaches and healers and Tony Robbins have made millions by drilling and selling these 2 concepts to the psyche of the lost souls on this planet.
Because it's true.
Positive affirmations and letting go of conditioning will put your life a gear up.
I found a dream house in Ibiza sweating hard on exercises from The Secret and drawing my vision board.
For the real deal, I needed to take the elevator down to ground zero of my soul.
To face demons and devils that make The Secret a simple trick cleverly disguised as abundance bla bla.
Here’s is what you need to face beyond bypass self-help vomit to embrace your deepest shit and pain so that the real abundance is accessible again.
How positive affirmations work
Affirmations and vision boards do work. They’re phasing one on your path of becoming yourself.
I will take myself as an example here while being aware that this probably read like bragging about my past success. My purpose is to give you guidance, but only when it’s actually aligned for you and gives you value in this moment of your life.
I made my first vision board around 2008. A vision board is a collage of photo’s from glossy magazines with Ferrari’s, the top 10 houses of the world, ever-enduring epic romantic relationships and more stacks of money Jeff Bezos can hold.
No kidding, I did stick a picture of a villa with a full sea view in the middle. Then, I ferociously practiced step 2; Unbound daily gratefulness for receiving that new house and other things on the vision board for at least half a year as if it was already manifested.
And then completely forgot about it.
Until one magic day, I woke up in a hammock on the front porch of my (rented) 3 million $ villa with a 240-degree sea view in a natural park on the cliffs.
Positive affirmation, bringing yourself in a grateful feeling state all of the time, and being open for the impossible, definitely work.
But its not the real deal.
Let’s move to the next stage.
How letting go of conditioning works
You will never cross the ocean unless you have the courage to lose sight of the shore — Sergo on BitClout
In 2011, prior to moving to Ibiza, I did something that made that jump to my paradise possible. I started to realize I was conditioned in a financial culture. My Dutch upbringing.
Efficiency, duty, 10 to 12 hours working days, being over-insured, working my ass off only to pay fixed costs and getting stomach age from stress are high on the list of the Dutch work ethics.
They obscured my deeper wish. My ultimate dream of writing a novel.
I realized I needed to let go of that conditioning. But how? It’s difficult to voluntarily outcast yourself from your native culture. That’s exactly what’s needed when you aspire to become the shaman of your own life.
so finally that’s exactly what I did.
This is how you can let go of financial conditioning, aka security
- Get rid of 50–80% of your fixed monthly costs. Comon, you know which they are
- Screw insurances, you only live once. Do you really need health insurance?, If so, how many times did you use it the past 10 years? When they saved your financial life, keep them.
- Get rid of your expensive tiny apartment in that hipster hood and find a cheaper and more healthy way living closer to nature
- Get rid of your stuff before the stuff gets rid of your dreams
- Move to another country. Shaking up your life will make you loose dusty feathers
- Trust life enough that your jump will be epic. do some bungy jumps that scare the living daylight out of you to practice
I moved to Spain. All it took was a car with some drums, a hammock, and an adventurous road trip through France.
My trust got rewarded. And eventually, I wrote my novel while enjoying never-ending sea views.
Let go of the financial conditioning and security of your culture.
It’s only one possibility created by mass conditioning that always goes for the road with the least resistance and most real-life avoidance.
Go where your resistance is. Be willing to lose sight of the shore.
And still, you need to dive deeper. Here is where the real work starts.
The Core of the Matter — The thing that many self-help gurus never mention
This is the real deal. Forget about all the material abundance vomit. You are abundance, that’s your God configuration.
You don’t even have to do anything for it.
The issue is hidden under layers of something we all have; Core unworthiness
You can’t dive into your Donald Duck pool of abundance all of the time, since you don’t feel that connection all of the time with your natural abundance.
And here is where the real deal comes in.
Positive affirmation do work, I showed you, but only on a certain level. When you are unaware of deeper layers of not being worthy joy, beauty or a deep nurturing relationship, then you are prone to fall back into repetitive patterns that keep you from the real deal.
You subconsciously keep limiting yourself beyond your thoughts.
What is core unworthiness?
As a baby, you take on the toxicity of the world directly around you.
It works like this: As a baby, you pick up the energetic communication of your parents. The world, the universe, is all about you. Me and the other doesn’t exist yet. You are the universe. So when your parents argue, or worse, that’s your universe. When your father shouts at his boss on the phone and you happen to be near, that’s your universe. This makes you feel bad, you are bad, it’s now your energy. You were not able to discern toxicity having nothing to do with you since in the core of your baby-being you are pure joy, bliss, abundant life.
Do we really have to dive that deep? Yes.
Spoiler Alert: There is also a second layer of core unworthiness.
When we grow older, we create this second layer of unworthiness to prevent feeling the first one since it’s so freakin’ painful. This is the space where your limiting beliefs come from.
It is much safer to play small than opening up fully to life and joy with the risk of not receiving, because that was your initial ‘hurt like hell’ imprint
Just feel it — you’ll never be able to completely heal it
The deepest layer of my core unworthiness stays around most of my life. And yours too. It’s a spiritual myth that we will completely heal, and then become enlightened as if that was an ever-present state.
No, the real-world shit will keep on challenging you, only on other levels.
When life is a gym, its about showing up everyday, do the muscle training. Train your soul to keep on feeling and opening up to all there is inside of you
By opening up more, by becoming more vulnerable, by feeling deeper. That’s how you access your ground zero layers of your soul.
What keeps you from feeling deeper is your pain and moreover your fear for pain. When we dive deeper into pain, it’s nothing more or less than the resistance you have for feeling deeper, to move some energy that’s stuck deep inside of you.
All of your pain evolves around the resistance of feeling deeper. The fear of what demon or devil you might find when you simply allow yourself to feel more.
Train your awareness muscle, feel what actually goes on inside of you most of the time. The sensations in your body when you close or open, when you are in your flow, and connect to your joy. Start to realize when you are open or closed.
You need to make a better connection with your body for this, that’s called embodiment. Your body is your holy antenna.
In essence, it’s that simple. But at the same time, incredibly difficult knowing that you probably closed your deeper layers most of your life. When you open up to feeling more joy, you also open up to feel emotions that you might have labeled as negative. That you tried to positive affirm out of your mind following by-pass lightworkers.
That won’t work. Negative emotions don’t exist. That’s the label your mind created to keep you stuck. They are just expressions of one and the same: your life-force energy.
It’s all about feeling this energy, allowing it, and not make anything wrong in yourself
Resistance for feeling deeper expresses itself in making yourself wrong and putting layers of self-blame and shame around parts of your essence. You’ll need to open up to these parts, feel them and embrace them and eventually integrate them.
It gets even better when you’re being witnessed by a circle of loving souls when you’re opening up the crack of your core unworthiness.
All healing comes through connection.