We all know that to have self-love is to have a high regard for your own well-being and happiness. To have a healthy self-love is to take care of your own needs and not sacrifice your well-being to please others. Self-love is not settling for less than you deserve, it’s deciding that you truly deserve the best.
However, you may be holding onto one or a few limiting beliefs about yourself that are getting in the way from experiencing authentic unconditional love in your life. When we have a lack of self-worthiness, we end up creating a less desirable trajectory for our lives. If you desire to be a blessing for others by giving love, you first need to be able to receive that very same love! Limiting beliefs are actually just programming. These beliefs have nothing to do with the real you - the multidimensional pure loving awareness that you really are.
I’ve listed just a few limiting beliefs below.
See if you recognise any of these in yourself.**
- I am not loveable
- I can’t do anything right
- I have to be perfect
- I need others to like me
- I always scare people off
- I am not sexy enough
- I am not worthy of a good partner
- I can’t be my real self
- It’s too late to change
- I can’t trust people
- I am always abandoned
So, what can we do about these pesky illusions that plague our life and stop us from fully loving our true being?
Allow me to show you how you can reprogram your beliefs and create a new set of neural pathways that fully support self-love. The more you practice these steps as beliefs come up, the faster you will transform your perceptual filter system, and open channels of abundance.
First, it’s important to be aware of the following steps.
- Ask yourself what is the benefit of this belief.
- Flip the belief over to find the equal and opposite belief.
- Ask yourself for the specific evidence that this belief is true (prove the belief).
- Form a new affirmative belief based on new research and evidence.
Let's imagine that deep down in your subconscious mind you've grown up believing that you are not loveable (and you can imagine the kind of heartache that one would experience with this mindset - rejection and abandonment issues would be strong, perhaps even addictions to compensate, but I won't go into that right now) ...
So, step 1: Ask yourself what is the benefit of this belief. In this case, to feel unlovable creates an opportunity to learn how to be loved.
**Step 2: **Flip the belief over to find the equal and opposite belief. So, I am not loveable becomes I am fully loveable.
Step 3: Ask yourself for the specific evidence that this belief is true (prove the belief). Let's see...No one has actually told me that they don’t love me. I may be exaggerating. Love is sometimes demonstrated through acts of service, kind gestures etc. Perhaps I need to re-evaluate how people have shown their love. And, specific evidence shows that my mum loves me and so does my brother.
Step 4: The final step. Form a new affirmative belief based on the new research and evidence… So based on the evidence I've gathered today about being unlovable, I really can't feel the same way anymore and so my New Belief is: “I am loved by many, both overtly and covertly and there is room for me to learn how to be even more lovable.”
For this person who went through life generalising that they are unlovable - they can no longer use this rather sweeping generalisation.
It doesn’t fit and it doesn’t empower. When you break it down there are many factors keeping this belief from sticking.
What happens on a neurological level, you may ask? When this person is faced with old triggers that would normally bring up the feeling of being unlovable, the belief won’t hold the same power. Eventually the old neural pathway will shrivel up as new beliefs replace and empower.
So, this is how we can transform and eradicate old beliefs that no longer serve us about ourselves. You can follow these easy steps and reframe your perception of reality. And believe me, things will change for you in miraculous ways when you decide to pull out some of these pesky limiting beliefs that have been lurking in the shadows. Healthy shadow work is clearing the old programming that's keeping you from realising your true self.
Self-love is really just remembering that you are not you’re programming and doing away with its hold on your sovereignty as a multidimensional being.
So, go ahead and challenge your limiting beliefs that you are not worthy of love and watch your world change for the better.
You will attract more reasons to feel the unconditional love of the Creator whilst being able to give a greater love to others.