Further to my article on day 27… 13. THE LAW OF THE OPTION OF LOVE
The Option of Love makes it possible to pass the tests that life presents. The option of pride makes it impossible to pass through the gate to the realm of love, peace and happiness.
Life is continually subjecting us to tests to measure the state of our spiritual development. All human beings, with greater or lesser frequency, face different situations with differing degrees of difficulty associated with relationships, health, finances and the places where we are, which confront us with our deepest fears.
In these situations what manifest are the mental limitations that we have not yet overcome, which trigger in us states of anxiety, suffering, aggression, defensiveness, stress, guilt, anger, resentment, hate, vengeance and violence so common to human experiences.
When we understand the day-to-day difficulties we encounter, are opportunities to learn what we do not yet know, and that subsequently we will be presented with tests to verify what we have now learnt of the Laws of the Universe and of Life, we are ready to use the option of Love in the face of any type of difficulty that life presents us with.
When the ego – which contains pride – is stronger than understanding, an individual is not yet able to use the option of love and therefore cannot obtain satisfactory results. Freeing oneself from inner conflict and finding peace, harmony and satisfaction in life requires ridding oneself of pride, which is a poor counsellor because it is rigid, does not recognise mistakes, is not willing to compromise, does not know how to apologise, does not make the first move, never asks for help, does not forgive, does not insist…
The Law of Option makes it possible to give love an opportunity, particularly in situations in which there seems to be “no way out” and we do not know what to do.
It is then that it is necessary to gather up one’s courage to accept the situation, setting pride aside in order to apologise if appropriate. Even if we feel that we are the losers, wishing the one who has defeated us all the best. Or otherwise give way in our aspirations in order to give someone else the opportunity to find their own happiness; and even learns to be happy with the happiness of others. And be thankful to those who attack us with their mistakes or ignorance, because they give us the opportunity to learn to love and to transcend our own egoism by wishing them wholeheartedly prosperity, happiness and health.
Every time we compromise a further learning of love we are closer to achieving a life filled with happiness, peace, service, harmony, health, abundance and prosperity. When we learn to love there is nothing left for us to learn from difficulties, and one by one they will gradually disappear. There is always an Option of Love in any situation.
Everything we do with love goes well. The Option of Love never fails.
We must not limit our capacity to love on the grounds of external circumstances, because what is happening around us is generated by us; although we may justify our behaviour, it is often the consequences of our ignorance. We need to dismantel justifications, because it is not things or people that upset us, it we who are upset with them.
When we realise that the problem is ours and not someone else’s, anger immediately disappears, because the justification that was maintaining the bad temper leaves the mind. Consider this example:
You’re the company accountant. You go to look for a document in the files and it’s not there. Your usual reaction might be to get annoyed with your secretary, who’s responsible for filing everything; you’re furious and your tell her off. Your secretary calmly says: “Don’t you remember? You’re the one, who took the document out, then I gave it back to you, and you forgot to put it back in the filing cabinet…”
The anger and irritation disappear right there, because there is no justification.
Justifications are a type of archive that makes us suffer and get upset, it damages our relationships and prevents us from being successful in life. Justification lead us to have negative reactions, blame others, not take responsibility for our own processes and enter states of crisis, bitterness, frustration and depression, resulting in total blockage of our lives.
We learn justifications through dreadful pedagogical systems or inappropriate information, and with phrases such as: “When someone doesn’t greet you, be cross; when someone misses an appointment, be cross and tell them off; when you see your partner with someone else, feel ill, jealous and distressed; when your son or daughter goes out without permission, punish them…”
This is how we generate the archive of justifications.
The option of Love consists in being happy that someone else is happy, not in wanting to be right. We suggest taking advantage of all the opportunities that life presents to with to free ourselves from pride. To achieve this we can do the exercise of not contradicting anyone who disagrees with us – in simple, unimportant things, to start with –
Pride wants’ love understands and accepts.
As explained, the ego is a weapon that we use to fight against life, which does not allow us to establish good relationships or achieve success. Once we effectively replace the ego’s weapons with the tools of love, we are ready to become human beings of peace and love, and to train ourselves in the use of the tools.
TOOLS OF LOVE
Accepting: We accept situations and people as they are. We are happy that others are happy. We accept that everything that happens is neutral and necessary.
We give up: Trying to change others; arguing with a trying to change the perfect order of the Universe; trying to interfere with the life experiences of others.
Acting: We act with total efficiency and calmness in any circumstance that arises, giving the best of ourselves. Doing is the key to having. Instead of reacting, we act.
We give up: attacking anything or anyone in thought, word and deed. We will be absolutely firm and loyal to the agreements and commitments that we freely establish.
Adapting: To the place where we are meant to carry out functions to achieve a life filled with satisfaction.
We give up: Fleeing from where we are and the situations we have to experience. Believing that happiness is outside: it is a false illusion.
Thanking: We are grateful for everything that we have and all the difficult and painful situations, because they are opportunities that life gives us to learn and improve in our spiritual development.
We give up: Suffering with difficulties, by understanding that they have a deep purpose of love for us to recognise the Law and free ourselves from suffering.
Taking responsibility: We take responsibility for the result of our decisions and our life experience. We are the cause of our thoughts, feelings and emotions, not what is happening around us nor what others think, say or do.
We give up: Blaming anything or anyone for what does or does not happen to us. There is no one to blame. Others may make mistakes, but they are not to blame.
Respecting: We respect everyone in their ideas, customs, behaviours and their right to take their own decisions. We need to understand that each individual is doing the best they can, even if they make mistakes.
We give up: Criticising, judging, condemning and punishing anyone for any reason, because we understand that each individual is doing the best they can. We will give information of wisdom only to those who accept our offering.
Valuing: We all value and enjoy immensely all that we have and all that we do. We always have what we need.
We give up: Complaining about what we have. Prosperity is the result of valuing.