Contemplating ‘who you are being’ draws you inwards and invites you to be more congruent with your true self. The idea of ‘being’ is a subtle yet profound aspect of oneself that is the foundation of all that is evident about an individual, such as their personality, actions, and words. It can set you on a path to self-discovery and fulfilment. Being seems to be a verb (how are you being) and a noun (who are you being). It calls for a closer examination.

Self-awareness

Think of ‘who you are being’ as the framework that shapes everything you do and say, like a screen in a movie theatre or a blackboard on which you write with chalk. By influencing how you think, act, and respond to the world around you, this overarching context sets the stage for your behaviour, personality, and presence. It is the sum total of your self-consciousness and exploring it can raise self-awareness and help you understand yourself.

• When I look towards myself, what is the all-encompassing expression of my selfhood that I discover?
• Which thoughts, evolving beliefs and shifting stories come together to form my sense of identity, or my ‘I-ness’?”
• How do my emotions, actions, and expressions shape my identity? Are these patterns an authentic reflection of who I am?

Who was I being

As you turn your gaze towards yourself, what you find first is your self-concept — the story that you tell yourself about who you are. You may also see some imperfections or flaws.

But clearly, this impression of the self is shaped by the past, based on what you have seen yourself think, do, feel and accomplish. It ought to be possible to free yourself from it if you can snap out of the past and bring yourself to the present. Then, you would be able to see that the person you have been up until now is not the person you need to be in the future. The past is gone, and you have the freedom to reinvent yourself from the very next moment. You are free if you don’t burden yourself with the remembrances from your past and bind yourself to the old way of being.

How can I be someone I truly honour?

Recognizing that you have the power to transform, you can choose to take responsibility for who you are going to be. You have the ability to shape yourself into a new person — the one you admire and respect. You notice that ‘Being’ is an evolving, dynamic idea.

• Who must I be to be the best version of myself?
• What new ways of being, do I want to embrace, and which aspects of my old self do I need to let go of?
• Who does my heart want me to be?

Contemplation of who your heart truly desires you to be, calls for you towards greater alignment and congruence with your core. Being more integrated with your true self. The reflection also draws your focus inwards. Perhaps, aligning with your heart’s desires can help you become the version of yourself you approve of and lead you towards a more fulfilling life. And, you find that it enhances your ease, self-assuredness, conviction and confidence. Perhaps, others notice that something is different about you. You seem more clear and centred.

Being with others

Being has an element of being ‘out there’, with others. Martin Heidegger called it dasein- ‘being there’.

You can’t be in isolation of who you see yourself being with others, and who can see reflecting as in others’ eyes. Contemplation of your way being of also shifts how you engage with others and ‘who’ you show up as in your relationships and conversations. You begin to be more spacious, generous and less demanding.

Authenticity

You feel the urge to shed the persona that you’ve been projecting and want to embrace authenticity, without any reservation or compromise. This calls for courage, but as you experiment with being more open and vulnerable, you realize that it is setting you free. You feel lighter and more self-expressed. Gradually, you stop holding yourself back, till you refuse to settle for anything less than the most authentic expression of your most genuine self.

It brings extraordinary ease as you are no longer burdened with the pressure of maintaining an external facade of an artificial persona. Others are interested. You seem real and authentic. They can see reflections of themselves in what you share and they want the ease you seem to have.

Being Love

Your inner ease also allows greater compassion for yourself as well as for all others. You spontaneously care more for others’ predicaments, listen more deeply and connect with greater empathy. Your heart wants to open to love and to express itself by helping. As you yield to it more and more, the heart heals away the hesitations that were holding it back from unconditional love and its natural expression in service.

Self-realisation

Before long, you begin to discover that ‘Being’ actually points you in the direction of ‘who’ you are- the real Self. And it is already perfect, pristine and incomprehensibly magnificent. It does not shift, evolve, or require improvement. You sense that you are already complete. And that the self which is changing and improving is your ego-linked identity. The realisation of your real Self as a peaceful, blissful radiance, eases away the strife, seeking and struggle. You can now let yourself be.

This is the real reward of the contemplation of being. The new goal now is to embrace and cherish this truth fully and to settle down in it. Let it radiate as love unbridled.

Heart takes over

Doing, controlling and exerting now wants to make way for allowing and appreciating. You find yourself more willing to have the flow of life take you where it is time for you to go. You find yourself saying ‘yes’ more often. The actions flow more gracefully as you surrender the resistance to ‘what wants to happen’.

You no longer need to have it ‘your way’. Little more every day, you learn to have faith and release the need to have it all clear in advance, the need to have a plan. You let your heart sense ‘wants to emerge’ and then lead the way and assert itself more and express more passionately, more fully. You feel more alive than ever.

You are only focused on keeping the ego-linked intellectual mind out of the way. The extraordinary wisdom that now radiates does not seem yours. You realise that through your own heart, it is the Source leading. Doership makes way for gratitude and your accomplishments bring more humility. Others saw you in action, but it was all Heart.

Not being

Persistently, the silence calls you inwards. To be more subtle and still. Embracing gratitude eases away the assertion of will, the Source leads through your heart. Gradually the desire to create an impact or be remarkable fades and even the need to be noticed becomes less urgent.

Little by little, day by day, you surrender your individual self and its pursuits. Letting go of your need to exist and be. Happy as the stream that is surrendering itself to the Ocean. You are letting go of who you were being, to be who you truly are.

All things are born of being, being is born of non-being. — Tao Te Ching

Beyond the thinking, being self

Contemplation on Being is an exercise that invites you beyond the thinking self towards the real Self that you are. The empty consciousness which is the foundation of all thinking, speaking and doing. Pure awareness, looking and observing.

Pure Being

Your foundation is Pure Being. Its nature is fundamental bliss. The sweet empty absolute. You are that placid, calm and pure space. The backdrop on which all things appear. The screen that supports the drama. It is subtle and quality-less but we can slowly learn to be in its stillness.

‘Be’ open. Observing yourself acutely. Yet not forming any opinions whatsoever.

You might find that you visit yourself for a moment and but again catch yourself lost in your thoughts. Resisting thinking is thinking too, now there’s a Catch-22. Love is the only recourse. Be kind to your thinking self. Have self-love for the thinking part of you. It is learning to slow down and be still in Itself.