As a young kid I was an easy target to be picked on and laughed at because I never reacted or defended myself.
They thought I was weak or scared and that boosted their egos giving them a sense of control and power but in reality, I never got offended, took anything personally, or felt the need to get on their level of trying to place someone else below me; instead, I just stayed calmed, quiet and that gave me the ability to observe and understand.
In my teenage years I came to understand that when someone reacts and becomes an emotion, they’re gone. They’re not here anymore, they’re not present, they can’t reason or use logic, but instead they have been taken over by an external energy (emotion) into their own made-up world disconnecting them from reality and that negative energy field became in charge of their being confusing them in thinking that’s who they are.
When this happened, I felt there was no point in trying to have a conversation or explain the situation so I would just dismiss them, give them their space and wait for them to come back to the present moment.
I had a squeaky and slow voice as a kid (thank God for puberty) and for some reason that used to bother some people. They used to always mimic my voice and tell me to speak right in a demanding way. In my own mind I looked at them as an entity who wasn’t able to comprehend the fact that that’s how my voice is.
That confused me because they claimed to be an intelligent person but weren’t able to grasp the fact that that’s not me doing it on purpose or have any control over it but that’s just how I am and instead of getting upset, I had compassion for them because they weren’t able to comprehend simple things.
I couldn’t understand how they weren’t able to accept and understand that people are unique, they don’t have to be how they want them to be. I guess “intelligent” people lack common sense.
As I’ve gotten older, I realized the demons that the bible talks about are not actual entities with horns that look scary, but what the bible refers as demons are negative emotions like anger, jealousy, guilt, shame, greed, hatred, lust, pride, greed and everything else that takes you away from your presence.
When someone is operating from those lower frequencies, they’re being used as an outlet for evil and most times they’re not even aware because there’s no consciousness, awareness, presence, God in their being.
Most children and animals are more connected to reality, they are more conscious. When you look into their eyes, you’ll see purity and innocence. In the other hand, when you look into the average adult, you’ll see fear, guilt, jealousy, lust, anger, shame, or any other emotion that drifted them away from reality.
I always felt different, but I never understood how or why but now it’s clear to me, it’s because I don’t have an ego leading my life. I’m more connected to my soul that’s why I’ve always had unconditional love for everyone and always wanted to help even those who hated me.
I would look deeply into their hearts, find out what their problem is, why are they in that situation, why are they doing the things they’re doing, and their need, problem, or anxiety would become my consideration and I would try to help in any way.
This became a flaw because I was putting other people’s need first that I lost contact with myself.
The soul always thinks of others, while the ego only thinks of themselves, the soul is considerate, the ego is inconsiderate, the soul is ready to be used and ready to serve, the ego uses other people, the ego only has one language, the language of self and the world has to revolve around it.
People that only operate from an ego are empty, bored, exhausted, dragging themselves somehow, in the name of duty, in the name of family, in the name of the nation, or in a cycle of seeking external pleasures just trying to escape themselves.
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