15 years ago, I hit rock bottom. Chaos. Took a break from nursing school. Couldn’t think straight – just chest pain, headaches, panic, lost feeling. Felt being a loser in front of my parents.

The breaking point?
At the 5th semester, a clinical instructor tore into me at the nursing station for a full 20 minutes while everyone (nurses, doctors, fellow students) all watching. It was like a public execution.
I felt shameful, powerless, I can’t anymore.

Then one desperate night, I googled "meditation" and found an Osho talk.
One line stuck: "Be an observer. Watch the body. Let thoughts pass."
So I tried it. Watching mountains of emotions surfacing. It was overwhelming. I was lying on fetal position, excruciating sharp Chest pain – worst pain of my life, Can’t breathe.
But I kept watching. No energy to fight anyways. Not even hoping.

20 minutes later:
Silence.
Openness.
The first stillness I’d felt in years.
Turns out It’s about finally seeing yourself clearly – panic attacks, shame, and still not looking away.
The storm isn’t you.
You’re the One watching the storm.

Years later, I passed the Quebec Order nurse license exam.
I met that clinical teacher again. I thanked her.
That brutal experience was what instilled in me to gear all my patient care at its best, attention to detail, bedside manner with authentic presence.