Rock bottom to resilience
15 years ago, I hit rock bottom. Chaos. Took a break from nursing school. Couldn’t think straight – just chest pain, headaches, panic, lost feeling. Felt being a loser in front of my parents.
The breaking point?
At the 5th semester, a clinical instructor tore into me at the nursing station for a full 20 minutes while everyone (nurses, doctors, fellow students) all watching. It was like a public execution.
I felt shameful, powerless, I can’t anymore.
Then one desperate night, I googled "meditation" and found an Osho talk.
One line stuck: "Be an observer. Watch the body. Let thoughts pass."
So I tried it. Watching mountains of emotions surfacing. It was overwhelming. I was lying on fetal position, excruciating sharp Chest pain – worst pain of my life, Can’t breathe.
But I kept watching. No energy to fight anyways. Not even hoping.
20 minutes later:
Silence.
Openness.
The first stillness I’d felt in years.
Turns out It’s about finally seeing yourself clearly – panic attacks, shame, and still not looking away.
The storm isn’t you.
You’re the One watching the storm.
Years later, I passed the Quebec Order nurse license exam.
I met that clinical teacher again. I thanked her.
That brutal experience was what instilled in me to gear all my patient care at its best, attention to detail, bedside manner with authentic presence.
It's amazing how you turned such a difficult experience into a strength. Your story reminded me of how sometimes facing challenges head-on, even when it feels like a silly game, can lead to unexpected growth
Thank you for sharing such a personal and inspiring story. It's a powerful reminder of the potential for healing and growth even in the darkest of times.
That’s such a powerful story